sadness...

Good morning,

  Day next. Woke up and tried to save the life of a kitten this morning. We adopted her away from her mother a bit early, to avoid having her eaten by wild animals, or just becoming a Jaggy Wire... She got too cold, undernourished, something, and died today. Such is the nature of life i suppose. Tot barely acknowledged the event. Jay however had waterworks a flowin.

  One trauma down, time to get back to it. I have got to put a few hours in schooling today, and then hopefully tonight I'll be able to work through chapter two in the programming series.

  Putting this out for the world to see, i realized faster that I am quite flighty. Talking with the family about it I discover my weakness is still in finding drive to do things for myself. If someone wants to help me support my family, I am more than willing to learn how to help them, and with my background and skill set learning is a short process in most if not all cases, meaning I can be up and running pretty quick. But to leverage those skills to help myself... Is just not something I have in me in a direct manner. If I can find that... wow. look out. :D

  I guess, my annual blog is tailing to a close after the first week, as spending time with the family with a lack of organization or planning, is more important to me than investing the time to organize and plan, miss out on what is going on now... seems a bit counter to my purpose though... and that contradiction is lending to the weight of depression that was sparked by my leg and the last two years of political b.s. trying to get it fixed through 'proper channels'. lmao.